Holiday Survival Guide

Here’s Kathy’s fun guide for surviving the holidays–enjoy!

1.  Get plenty of beauty sleep.  Learn from children–take lots of naps (preferably not in front of customers or your boss.)  Back hallways and warehouse aisles are good locations.  Shopping mall benches are not.

2.  Drink plenty of liquids.  Techs and Installers should drink plenty of Coke, Pepsi, coffee and Red Bull.  Managers and supervisors should drink plenty of beverages with an alcoholic content higher than jet fuel.  Remember, don’t drink and drive!  Everybody’s too busy to bail you out.

3.  Get an early start for holiday preparations and prepare ahead of time.  February is not too soon.  Now is way too late.  Better hire someone else to decorate your own home.

4.  Buy presents throughout the year, then in December decide what you want to keep for yourself and what you want to give away.  Re-gifting is always permitted, just be careful not to give back to the original gift-giver, as this is a serious social faux-pas.

5.  Address your Christmas cards for next year right after this year’s holiday while you know who sent you one this year and who you still like.  Of course there is always the possibility that someone will move in the meantime so inform all your friends that this will result in a delay or possible cancellation of their card’s arrival.

6.  Give everyone a list of what you want them to buy for you so you won’t be disappointed.  Don’t wait for them to ask, since many people are not as highly organized as you are.  Catalog clips and website printouts are especially helpful as this eliminates look-alikes and cheap knock-offs.

7.  As far as entertaining goes—don’t!  Instead of throwing a party, invite yourself to somebody else’s house for the holidays.  Don’t ask what you can bring, either.  If forced, see Hint #2 and bring “jet fuel,” always appreciated as a hostess gift.

8.  Eat out—a lot.  This is no time to learn how to cook. Your local firemen and EMT personnel are busy enough as it is.  And don’t even think about buying a turkey unless it’s from Boston Market

9.  Eat by candlelight.  Do everything by candlelight.  Remember, most folks look better in the dark, especially after pulling an all-night installation.  (This is also the secret to a happy marriage!  That and diamonds.)

10.  Buy yourself something pretty.  The more sequins the better.  If you are a   male, you may want to cut back on the sequins thing, but to each his own.

11.  Wear knits—they don’t need ironing.  Avoid leggings unless you are 10 years old.  If it didn’t look good the first time around, what on earth makes you think it will look good now?

12.  Carry a really big purse with lots of snacks and the afore-mentioned jet fuel.  You won’t have time to make anything healthy, so go ahead and eat all the junk food you want.  You’ll feel better, and you can diet in January along with everybody else.  Repeat after me—“Chocolate is a health food.  Chocolate is a health food.”

Finally, remember the reason for the season and enjoy the many blessings you have!

Happy Holidays!

No driving if you’re drinking jet fuel!

Brought to you by Kathy Fediw, Johnson Fediw Associates.  Ph: 281-687-6966 www.JfaConsultingBiz.com       ©2009

Copyright Kathy Fediw, 2009.  If you’d like to use this article in your newsletter, please contact Kathy Fediw at kathy@jfaconsultingbiz.com for written permission first; or you may use a link to this page.